::Yawn::

I should be a lot more tired than I am. Like a fool, I stayed on to work 11-7 last night, and come about 4am, I was fighting to stay awake. I paced in the Rec Yard, chatted on the phone, and read old emails to keep my mind going. When it came time to drive home, I called my mom to chat, so I wouldn’t zonk out at the wheel.

I hit the shower before hitting the sheets – something about 16 hours in prison always makes me feel dirty, LOL. But when I fell into bed, I think I was asleep before my head even fit the pillow. I had been awake for almost 24 hours.

Four hours later, I was wide awake and irritated. I had time for 2 more hours of sleep, but I knew it wasn’t going to happen. So, I got up, made coffee, and sat down to Redbubble.

Low and behold, I placed in the Top Ten in three more challenges. So, my day started off cheerily, despite the limited sleep. Here are the photos:

Colorful Quiet placed 5th out of 51 entries in the September Avatar Challenge.

Solitude Falls placed 6th out of 21 entries in the Outstanding Orange Challenge.

Autumn Splendour placed 9th out of 17 entries in the Fall Challenge Challenge.

As you can see... my autumn images seem to be doing fairly well, LOL... Now if I can get the rest of my portfolio up to snuff...

I’m back at work now, and I’m a little rough around the edges, but I’ll get through the shift. The unit I’m on can be annoying, but I think they know that I’m in no mood for bullshit today, and they’ve been staying away from the desk. It makes me laugh, because if they used that intuition on the street, they probably wouldn’t be in prison to begin with.

Well, off I go. Perhaps I’ll write another post later. I may need something to keep me conscious.

Anticipating Vacation

September is my favorite time of year at home, so I’m really excited that I was able to get time off for vacation then. There is so much that I love about home that I’ve missed so much, and now that I’m down to less than two weeks till my trip, I’m anxious.

Oh, the things I love about home in September…

The nights are cold – you’d have to close the windows or toss an extra blanket on the bed at night. And you’ll get your first frosts then – not killing frosts, but light one – and despite them the days are fairly balmy, usually in the 70’s, but you can feel a chill on the northern breeze. All of the summer tourists have gone home by then, and the fall leaf peeper tourists haven’t come up yet, so you don’t have to share the area with idiot out-of-towners.

I’m looking forward to getting up early to drive the 20 minutes to the beach to run… and it will be chilly enough that I’ll be in shorts and a hoodie, and I’ll cringe when the surf splashes my feet, because the water will only be about 55 degrees. I’m looking forward to apple picking with my mamma, and helping my brother and Amy get things ready for the new baby. I’m anxious to do barn chores with my dad, and have afternoon tea with my grandmother. And my boys – oh, how I’ve missed them. There will be drunken ridiculous with the cops I used to work with. They’ve already called my mother and gotten permission to crash on her couch a few nights. And adventures with my girls… the town will be shaking its head and clucking its tongue at the shenanigans, I’m sure. They usually do, at any rate.

Yeah, I’m ready to go home. Twelve days. I’ll make it. :)

My New Addiction

So… I have a new addiction. As if I wasn’t already hooked strongly enough on my photography, I now have something in my life that is making me borderline obsess over it. It’s a website. Redbubble is my new love.

Jen got me hooked. I blame her. And the addiction is spreading like wildfire. I got Suzie hooked, and Scott started his own page there. It’s ridiculous. I’ve only been on the site for a little over a week, and I’ve already sold one piece, been featured several times, and a placed in the top ten on a challenge. It’s addicting.

And a photographer that I have long admired, John de Bord, has become a fan of MY work, which is pretty much the biggest compliment ever. I’m thrilled.

So, attached to my page here, you will find a widget that links to my site on Redbubble. Please feel free to stop by and browse :)

Adjusting

Well, I’m getting back to a routine…

Suzie went home to NH last week. The time since then has been a little strange. I got very used to having her here, and even though I’ve lived alone for the better part of 7 years, things felt a little off once she was gone. Gizmo missed her when she left, too. He sat in front of the door to the apartment and waited for her to come back in for almost an hour. And when she didn’t, he curled up on the couch, stared at the door and pouted. He spent the next several days mad at me – he’d leave the room when I came into it, and would sit with his back to me all the time. He’s come around – the days I went to work and he was alone, he was starving for attention as soon as I came in the door, and the desire to be petted clearly outweighed the resentment at Suzie being gone.

I spent the majority of last night and this morning setting my house to rights. My week of working daylight for CERT Training left my house in chaos. I had lived out of a duffel bag and a lunch box all week, and the state of affairs in the apartment were a testament to that -- Laundry left wherever it landed, dishes piled in the sink, and cat hair everywhere. So, I cleaned. It made me feel better.

And today, life falls back to it’s normal rhythm. I’m back on 3-11 shift starting today, and it feels good to get back into the swing of things. Tomorrow I’ll go back to the gym for the first time in what feels like forever, and I’ll start counting down the days till my vacation – 2 weeks exactly until I get to take off on an adventure. I’m looking forward to taking my time driving home – taking the very scenic route and driving up the coast the whole way. It will take me a couple days, as I plan to stop often for pictures and such. There are some lighthouses along the way that I want to hit, and a couple wineries in Rhode Island that I want to visit. After a wonderfully full and busy summer, I’m looking forward to some time to myself with my camera. This trip is exactly what I need.

This week was crazy – in a really good way. I had tactical training for the prison, and with its completion, officially became a member of our CERT Team. CERT (Corrections Emergency Response Team) is essentially the prison equivalent of SWAT. The training was fun – firearms, and tactical maneuvers. I qualified on every round of weapons testing on the first try. I think I surprised a few people – myself included. And the officers I went through with were great, and it was nice to get to spend some time with the officers from other shifts that I don’t get to see as much of. All-in-all, the week was a success. Exhausting and painful, but a success.

Professional Discourtesy

The radio was on. Aromatic steam filtered out of the lid of my coffee mug. The window was down, and I smiled as I took my first hit of morning coffee and maneuvered single-handedly through the quiet streets of Bellefonte. The rough edges from my short, 2-hr night’s sleep were smoothing out. The hot shower a half-hour prior had nudged me into consciousness, and the time since had lessened the irritability and fogginess. I took another sip from my mug and sighed audibly with contentment, though there was no one to hear it but me. The coffee was taking the final steps to making me human.

As I made the corner near the metal plant, I saw headlights approaching in my rearview. I didn’t give it much thought, as I took another sip of coffee and enjoyed the morning breeze on my face. Then the blue lights came on.

I sighed again, this time with mild irritation, and set my cup in the console as I pulled over. There goes the day…

I had all the usual stuff ready when the officer came to my window – license, registration, proof of insurance, handgun permit, and badge. And, despite the early hour, and despite the patrol spotlight expertly aimed right at my sideview mirror and into my eyes, I smiled at the officer as I handed him my information. “You were going awfully fast for this time of day,” he said almost absently as he looked over the documents.

Really? Because its 2:45am, and there’s no one on the road. Would you rather I speed while following a school bus, with bumper-to-bumper oncoming traffic?? Despite my sarcastic inner commentary, I chose not to say anything aloud.

The officer gave me the once over. “Going anyplace in particular in such a hurry?” I had all I could do not to laugh, as I looked down at my corrections uniform.

“Ummm… work?” Really, I’m just driving around aimlessly in the middle of the night in my uniform because it’s so fucking stylish. Dumbass.

“Well, I’ll be right back.” And the officer went back to his car, and proceeded to spend the next 15 minutes running my information, all the while his spotlight is still shining in my eyes, and time is ticking down to making me dangerously close to being late for work. He finally returns to my vehicle, hands me my information back, and says, “Well, here you go. You really need to slow down. It’s only 35mph through here, and I clocked you doing 41mph”.

I smiled, and because my patience had worn thin, so had my ability to be nice. “Well, glad you’re being vigilant out here. Because you know, it’s a high traffic area and all.” Sarcasm dripped from my tone. Inside, my voice of reason winced. But my cheery mood had been darkened by this particular cops lack of observation, and over-zealous need to pull people over for 6mph over the speed limit.

He just smiled, the sarcasm clearly going over his head. He gave me the once-over again, and suddenly something changed on his face. It was like he finally noticed the uniform, and made the connection. “Hey, you work at Centre County Prison, don’t you?”

I smiled sweetly. “Nope. I just like the uniform. Have a nice day.”

And so my morning started. I got to work on time, at the charming hour of 3am, and worked my four hours of overtime without incident. Now it’s time to see what the rest of the day brings…

Home Team Pride

Everyone marks time differently. Some mark it by days on the calendar, some by paychecks and holidays. But in the Blackwood/MacDonald residence? Here it is marked by two things, and two things only. Baseball season, and football season. For die-hard Red Sox and Patriot fans, nothing else matters.

So, the Sox aren’t having the most stellar season… it happens. No one appreciates the work behind winning if you never lose. And seeing as damn near half our line-up is sitting miserably on the Disabled List, our wins are much harder won than most. Tonight marks the last game in a 4-game series against the Yanks… and as always, our household is hoping for a win. So far so good – especially with Ellsberry finally off the DL and back in the game. Now, if we can keep Beckett from getting ejected tonight, it might just be a successful 9-innings.

And Thursday marks the first pre-season game for the Patriots, and it promises to be a good game, against the Saints at home in Gillette Stadium... It’s a new season, and hopefully a fresh start, with less injuries and less chaos than what came with last year’s endeavors. Suzie and I have all our fingers crossed for a season kicked-off right.

So, I'm an Addict... What of It??

So... people as a whole, I've found, are judgemental. I don't find this so much irritating as amusing -- mostly because people fail to see the irony that I see, and therefore it all becomes my own little private joke to enjoy.

I have a lifestyle that many don't understand. I choose to live at great distance from my family. I willingly go to prison for eight (and sometimes sixteen) hours a day. I run away when men fall in love with me, but still have an active and enjoyable sex life. I work out like a madwoman at every opportunity (and annoyingly, those opportunities aren't often enough these days). I drink coffee by truckload, and alcohol sparingly. I'm just as content to hike the Appalachain Trail as I am to lay on the beach, and I'm just as likely to wear high heels and short skirts as I am old holey jeans and my Red Sox cap -- and some days, I mix it up and wear the high heels with the Red Sox cap, which tends to raise eyebrows and turn heads. Both my personality and my lifestyle are a series of dicotomies that make me what I consider to be a unique and colorful individual. It works for me.

And of all the things I have mentioned above that are quirky, amusing, and in some cases downright weird, the thing that most people focus on is my addiction to the lifeblood of humanity: COFFEE.

My name is Carrie Blackwood, and I am addicted to coffee. What of it?

So what if it takes me several cups to really get functional in the morning. So what if throughout the day I take the time to enjoy another cup or two, to mellow myself out, or perk myself up. I could be addicted to heroin, or crack. I could be an adrenaline junkie, or an S&M addict that gets off on pain. Instead, I choose to enjoy my aromatic and flavorful happiness in a cup. And somehow that is more strange.

So, here's to you, Judges of My Lifestyle, as you look askance at me over your herbal tea. To you I raise my cup. My name is Carrie Blackwood, I'm a coffee addict, and I'm damn proud of it.

Jumpstart on My Day

Well... I'm up. And have been for almost 3 hours.

The last 24 hours have been a little ridiculous, and I was absolutely convinced that last night after my 12-hr work day, I would pass out like the dead when I crawled between the sheets. I was right. What I didn't count on was dreaming about work -- a dream so disturbing that it woke me out of said dead sleep at 4:30am in a cold sweat.

I couldn't fall back asleep after my dream. So, I got dressed and laced up my running shoes. I did a little over 2 miles through the residential areas of downtown Bellefonte. For about a mile or so I ran along Spring Creek, which was really nice. My time wasn't fantastic -- but it was dark, some of the route wasn't lit that well, and the sidewalks had holes that would swallow a volkswagen. So, I erred on the side of caution. When I finished the run, and stretched in my living room, I was hoping to crawl back into bed. But no. The endorphins kicked in, and I was wide awake. So, I did some work on the yoga mat, then hit the shower. Now I'm on my second cup of coffee, and am making a plan for this day that I've gotten an abnormally early start on.

So... off I go to walk to the garage and pick up my car -- it got inspected yesterday, but I had to work till 11pm, so I couldn't pick it up when they were done with it. But, they should be opening their doors about now, so I'll get that and hit the grocery store before the usual Saturday madness sets in. Off I go...